L; Wednesday, December 29, 2004 ♥
why am i such a busybody again? go care abt such things, but if i dun care, i am like a bloody person who dun care a thing. argh why is it that my behaviour is like that? can't i juz can a life of my own although there are lots of first time. But i think the veri veri veri first is the time where i know that sometimes, alone is the best. Find someone to talk to, being alone and dun be too kind hearted that is the best. i wish that i can do it but i can't, sometimes i juz wondered why am i like that.
Juz finish handling an aj an hr ago, this aj is like bgr or i shld say worst than bgr. It is like some of the segments in the movie bishonen. Two gay relationship happening here where two person is luving a guy at one time. instead of helping them, they are killing each other. kill kill kill, what an idea but then living behind those who cares is the worst of the worst. a passerby who see a guy looking depressed hopes to helpout but does not accept his kind help. thinking that his help is useless.....yah true at times but not always.
i hope that i can be slightly more open to it but, feeling tired of it, juz wish to get back to the lonely side where i msn him for a short chat or someone else bah....best is to a gal but after sometimes, i also dunno who am i admiring. it seems that all had become my friends, listener or someone who cares. nobody really understand me. Ok, i admit defeat, so wat, is that my character, always admitting defeat and admitting my wrong doings is not a solution, when i speak up, i dun dare to, when i wanna know more, i scared of scoldings....
where are my guts, when i am sick, i dun dare to say anything. am i such a timid guy, am i always the one saying all the bad things? why shld i and how shld i do it, the correct and healthy way? what kind of relationship or status i shld be in now, i need someone to tell me all these, best is the one who created us, why shld we learn and why are we created???? tired le, gotta sleep.....haiz....
don't you dare un'L' me.
never.
rooting for
DEATHNOTE no matter what.
look at that 'L'ly smile.♥
[Wednesday, December 29, 2004]
