L; Wednesday, May 03, 2006 ♥
time passes so fast, now it is 2nd day i am in KL.... think i am gonna miss my days spent here with my guys in KL... though is only 2 of them but the feeling is so shiok... Since den i always say i am the only child, the previous incident where i like someone are juz all lust.... it has been correct that i dun suits here since i do not engage in some activities..... u all know the disgusting parts lar... but i juz want someone to take care of like a brother or sister to mi... a person to occupy my heart is like totally different lo... i wanna get someone that is so special that i can give out all my love for her.... i got one initially but i let it slipped off, thinking back i am totally.......... Now i am exhausted, i cannot always depend on my friends only wat, those who have bf or gf, they also nid to accompany them de mah... how can i depend on them for life??? Till the day i die, no rite???
Initially something happened last nite, i thought it is something bad that i will nv had a chance to come again but in the end, prayers answered, to maintain it, i juz gotta keep things to myself lo.... Things that are told to mi are not to be leaked to others den??? Den who shld i tell in future??? I am thinking of it this way, typing it out followed by printing it if got the chance den keep it in a book, it is juz like telling a secret that no one knows till someone opens of see it...
Lonely is always lonely i feels so empty that i wanna have xiaoling back, it is like so far no ones gives me the feeling of love like this lo....
On tuesday i thought that i had no feelings at all but actually still have, becuz the 2 guys are still quarrelling, cold war something like that, there are things that they told mi but after some moments of thoughts i find that is better to keep it to myself, i want them to be happy as i wanna go back to KL in future to visit them again with of cos my kor...
den on wednesday, we go to cybercafe all of us playing maplestory for the whole day??? OMG!!! but nvm i am so happy with maple... at least
den on wednesday is consider the 2nd last day, we plan to go genting but we cancelled it to sunway pyramid, we walk and walk, den war and war den i think and think, till at night, the final destination at ipoh road for prawn noodles, den they go talk again, 5min later come back and shoot, den 10min later dun care liao... whoa okay that is fast but at least that is the way i want but i juz dunno how to win ppl heart back... i feel so sad that i am not as daring as them doing the kinda love that goes beyond the ethics....
I learnt that, there is always and end to everything, though is short but is fruitfull this time, i wanna hug him but i dun mind that i did not hug him becuz i got a photo with him. At least i dun feel that grief anymore... There is nothing as love that ends easily, is the matter we wanna put in effort or not....
There will be always a continuation to it as long as we maintain it the right way.... Alway sweet and sour and also sorrows but we have to say it out and settle it.... These are our lessons learn as we grow up and also how it shld be done in love too.... I will nv regret that i nv take u as a bro but i regret that i nv try out this relationship in the past but i dun mind... becuz i know i made the right choice....
To be continued
don't you dare un'L' me.
never.
rooting for
DEATHNOTE no matter what.
look at that 'L'ly smile.♥
[Wednesday, May 03, 2006]
