L; Wednesday, June 25, 2008 ♥
Day 2 aftermath of what had happened. Since that night, i have been thinking of someone, or rather some matters that had happened and still trying to figure out something before i sank into severe emo-ing state or worst still, depression. Hope that this day don't come or never come again. Guess not much people knows that i had suffered from depression before once in secondary school. At that point of time, i feel damn left out because some of the classmates takes me as their clown, played with my name, my parents' name and so on. Cursing and swearing, furthermore my mum takes me as her treasure.
Surrounds me in a cage and never really interacted with the outside world alone. Got once this kind of pressure had caused me so much of pain that i had vent my frustrations out without me knowing of my anger and sadness. Out of the blue i can juz throw things around and thinking of me like a superman flying from high floors. I don't wish this to be happening again.
Yes i do matters about how people looks at me, always trying out the best of me to others. But wonder why when i approach some people, it will not be my usual self that is expressing to others. Why is it so difficult for me to keep stable and keep quite? Why can't i have my own style, forever under other people's comments of myself. Why is it so?
If there is any passerby with comments, feel free to tag on it and if it is good enough, i am willing to take into consideration as there is a need for me to change for the better. Next yr is my 2nd cycle in life, 24yr old le. Cannot always stay in the current self liao le. I am still searching for the motivation to move. Wonder who can help me out.
don't you dare un'L' me.
never.
rooting for
DEATHNOTE no matter what.
look at that 'L'ly smile.♥
[Wednesday, June 25, 2008]
