L; Sunday, July 20, 2008 ♥
Yes along waiting relationships that needs communication which ends with a breakdown. How i wish that this breakdown is fruitful and indeed is fruitful.
Thinking too much whatever it is, makes mi feels that thinking juz the right amt is enough. And yes, this had reminded mi in work as well. Juz wonder why in almost every part of life this diagram comes in... Venn diagram, and yes 'someone' is correct about this fact, venn diagram where everything comes in a mix and make it well balanced. Wonder why ever since i started trying to open myself out, ends up in such a manner. Either i got the wrong company or the correct company yet scaring them away or even no one dare to come near me. I feels damn bad inside lo. Makes mi feels like an alien, when i am of some value den come look for me. If not i am like a useless piece of shit. It makes mi feels that day but some do view mi this way.
i nid someone to give mi two tight slaps to make mi wake up. it is good to fantasize, who dun like to think about the ideal case for each oneself? When u reached a pt where u think until u go crazy for that thing, i feels that i am someone who has no backbone. Not realistic. Time to be realistic man, no pt being too... Arghz, forget it. Time will show everything again.
What is time? A mathematical definition or what?
Time is a component of a
measuring system used to sequence events, to compare the durations of events and the intervals between them, and to quantify the motions of objects. Time has been a major subject of
religion,
philosophy, and
science, but defining time in a non-controversial manner applicable to all fields of study has consistently eluded the greatest scholars.
an extract from wikipedia.
This an issue where overtime, i will overuse of such things. No life with extra time makes someone mad about some things.
Time to get a life for myself, to make myself useful lo. To keep me occupied clear off some old stuffs, bring in new life. Make a new start, just now how days passes by and making my life all comes in place. When going too fast, stop and observe. Too slow, gotta work doubly hard. Yes no pt being too idealistic than realistic.
Do things that is more realistic than idealistic.
Idealistic vs realistic.
Case 1: Things that u wanted to do in your dreams, actual fact u cannot reach this stage or is impossible to do it.
Solution: work doubly hard to attain your motive if not discard and construct new ones. When u got the time and chance u will be able to obtain it.
Case 2: Saying is better than doing it.
Solution: Work more, talk less. Ppl see u work and not to see u talk.
Talk cock sing song play mahjong, all at the same time to give a complete mix? i think so...
Juz finished shower and lots of things awaken mi. Some pts nid to be questioned.
Why is he so impt to mi? Why is he always the one making me wake up my ideas? Why must i fall back when he speaks? why and why?
Is it because i looked back on what i had done and eventually fallen back into this pothole again?
Lack of confidence or simply no backbone? Why i can be more stronger when i was holding my 11B as a NSF but now when got my back pink IC with NSmen status, i become so weak? Lack of the support of juz simply a backbone without a board support or wat?
Think is all in becuz of my mind. Why am i such a stubborn idiot? Fuck it Colin, move back to a place where u are suitable, groom and grow from there. Create a mix like the venn diagram. Everyone got their uniqueness and this uniqueness will nv change. It must be something good to others. And my unique part is not thinking too much, that is a bad pt or root that nids to taken off and nv to revert again. BUT one good thing is that i always make an extra mile to put in some extra effort to do things. Nv to complain of heavy workload but is a place/learning ground to strengthen my abilities as well as relationship. Communications, time, effort tells a lot rather than small parts of life that gives extra problems like breakups, quarrels. No pt right? I know how to say that now why i keep committing it over and over again? Sounds so like noT mi.
BUT i got a motive, a target to start off with. That is the best of me. I shall work towards it as i dun wanna lose it for the last time.
AND I MEAN THIS IS THE LAST TIME!!!!! IF I EVER DO IT AGAIN, THAT'S IT. END OF MY LIFE FOR LOVE.... SHALL BE AT MOST A BACHELOR UP TO THE AGE OF 35 DEN GOT A WIFE OR NO WIFE STILL... WE SHALL SEE, TIME WILL PROVE MY EFFORT.
TIME+EFFORT=RESULTS...
FINAL STAGE TO PERFORM. NO MORE CHANCE GIVEN BOI!!! TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT COLIN, DECISION IS IN YOUR OWN HANDS.
don't you dare un'L' me.
never.
rooting for
DEATHNOTE no matter what.
look at that 'L'ly smile.♥
[Sunday, July 20, 2008]
